


My Poetry

by Rae_Todd



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Blood, Death, Depressing, Insanity, Love, Pain, Poetry, Sad, Sadness, meaningful, selfharm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-21
Updated: 2016-04-21
Packaged: 2018-06-03 16:51:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 24
Words: 4,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6618595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rae_Todd/pseuds/Rae_Todd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is just a collection of poems that I have written. I hope you enjoy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

** Walls **

A girl sits alone in a dark room.  
The walls are closing in on her and they whisper words that scare the young child.  
They speak of things she should do to her self,  
Things she should do to her family.  
She sits in the dark corner and cries.  
She skips her meals like the walls say.  
She cries every night because of the fighting her mother and father do about her not eating.  
The girl wishes to die.  
She wishes to be gone from this earth but,  
These walls keep her here until they're done with her.

 

 

  
** Darkness of Death **

The darkness of death takes over,  
It covers me in a thick warm black blanket.  
I feel comfortable.  
I feel safe.  
But I feel alone and lost.  
I close my eyes but there’s still only darkness when I open them.  
I can hear my family crying,  
My love screaming as he holds me in his arms.  
I can’t feel his warmth.  
I cant taste the salt of my family’s tears.  
I can never feel a nice breeze blowing my hair from my face.  
I can never feel the warmth of the sun.  
I can no longer feel the strong arms of the man I love.  
I am not alive.  
I am lost in the darkness of death.


	2. Chapter 2

**Empty**

The light has gone out.  
The happy feelings have left.  
There is only sadness and pain.  
Since the day she left the nights have been long and the days empty.  
Nothing feels right anymore.  
The words I write mean nothing.  
The colors I see are all dull.  
The songs I hear are nothing but lifeless sounds.  
Nothing is the same anymore.  
The hope and dreams I had are gone.  
My life with her just gone.  
I’m empty with out her,  
nothing but emptiness.

 

**Demise**

Death and Demise is what I wish for.  
The town has already been taken over.  
Everyone is dead.  
No one is alive.  
There’s no heart beat left in this place.  
The lights are dim.  
The clouds of ash hiding the bodies that lay on the ground.   
I trip and fall seeing the dead body of my mother laying close to a man I do not know.  
Tears sting my eyes and I scramble to get up.  
This is all that’s left now.  
Tears and death.  
I must find my death.  
I must be free from this hell.  
I can’t be alone here.  
I must find a way out.  
I need to find my Demise.


	3. Chapter 3

  
**Illusion**

What is this I see?  
It’s not real?  
How is it not real?  
I see it right in front of me.  
This life I have.  
How can this all be an illusion I made when I was a child?

The doctors all tell me I need to step out of this,  
but I have no clue what they’re talking about.  
I’m Living my life and that’s it.  
This is not an illusion.  
This is my perfect life,  
with perfect friends,  
a perfect happy,  
Perfect grades,  
and perfect health.

This can’t be an illusion.  
If it is then,  
illusion’s must be the most beautiful thing’s in the world


	4. Chapter 4

** Deception **

Deception, what a word,  
What a game.  
You have deceived me.  
I have fallen for your tricks,  
for your lies.

Deception is the game we play.  
We go through the levels over and over trying win.  
Your lies won’t get me any more.  
This time I will deceive you.

 

 

 

  
** Excitement **

Excitement fills my body,  
My heart races and tears sting at my eyes.  
My breath is shaky and my hand is over my chest.  
It’s the big day.  
It’s my big day.  
The day I get to marry the person I want to be with for the rest of my life.

I put on the white dress and get my hair done,  
I look beautiful and I feel beautiful.  
I can already hear the piano.  
I’ve waited weeks for this.  
I can’t believe it’s happening.


	5. Chapter 5

** Vibrant **

The colors I see are so bright.  
They light up my dark world.  
I walk alone in this beautiful forest,  
Letting the light wind kiss my pink rosie cheeks.  
The birds sing a sweet song,   
that makes my heart hum.  
Every little sound makes me feel more and more at home.  
Every little sight brings hope into my soul.  
Hope for a better place.  
Hope for perfect peace.

 

 

  
** Fusion **

Together by something unknown.  
Held by something stronger than any man.  
This bond is be gaining to break.  
It’s cracking and the tight embrace is weakening.  
Soon there will be nothing left.  
There won’t be an embrace.  
There will be nothing.  
No more fusion.  
No more love.  
No more anything.


	6. Chapter 6

** Smoke **

I take a long drag of my last cigarette.  
The smoke flows around me and fills my lungs.  
I close my eyes letting the dizziness take over.  
I feel better.  
The cigarette between my lips start to burn them slightly.  
I welcome the feeling.  
The burn is punishment for the act.  
The smoke burning my eyes as I open them is also a punishment.  
I take one last drag then put out my good friend.  
I will soon see one of his brothers.

 

 

** Effulgence **

A sweet girl sits alone in her dark room.  
She has a beautiful radiance about her,  
but her light is burning out.  
She’s taken all she can take.  
She’s been a happy girl,  
Always smiling,  
Always laughing.  
But after she lost someone she loved dearly her light has gone dim.  
It’s been almost a year and her light just keeps getting darker and darker.  
She’s all alone.  
She’s sacred.  
Her radiance is leaving.  
Soon she will not be the beautiful happy girl she was growing up.  
Soon she’ll be a monster the darkness has created.


	7. Chapter 7

** Empyreal **

Utopia, My Utopia.  
My light.  
My happiness.  
I long for it.  
I wish it to be here.  
I see it ,slightly, and it pushes me to continue,  
with this horrible life.  
I know if I keep going strong then I will get the happiness I need.  
I know if I keep working I will do what I need to do.  
I must keep going.  
I want my light, the highest heaven.  
So I will keep pushing.  
I will break down the walls in my way.  
I will struggle, but I will make it.  
I have to.  
My Empyreal is there waiting for me.

 

 

  
** Caliginous  **

Darkness, there’s darkness inside of me.  
My soul is dark.  
Maybe my whole insides are dark.  
They might be.  
I wouldn’t be too surprised.  
I’m always told by others that I’m a dark person.  
Is that bad?  
Everyone needs a little dark in them,  
A little Caliginous.


	8. Chapter 8

** Immure **

Help! I’m becoming one of these white walls.  
I’m becoming hard and empty.  
My emotions can’t come out anymore.  
There’s no more tears, no more anger.  
While people bump into me I can do nothing but stand there.  
People mark me and harm me.  
I’m ignored and forgotten,  
as I’m replaced and covered.  
I’m sacred.  
Please save me from these white walls.


	9. Chapter 9

** Evil **

Evil thoughts,  
Evil words,  
Evil feelings,  
Evil actions,  
Evil everything.  
How can we survive with all this evil?  
What is the point?

We are always told to be good,  
But why not be like everyone else?  
Why not fit in so you don’t get harmed.

No don’t even ask those questions.  
It’s wrong to be evil.  
It’s wrong to harm others, or yourself.  
It is horrible.  
No one should wish pain on another.

Be the light and go against the evil.  
Push past all the evil things and become better.  
Treat people with care.  
Show them that not everyone is evil.  
Show them they aren't alone.

Don’t fall for the evil.


	10. Chapter 10

** Calling **

I’m calling out to you,  
To every lost spirit,  
To every dying soul.  
Listen to me all of you.  
There’s something better then just wondering around lost.  
You can make something of yourself.  
Just because you’re dead doesn't mean you can’t do anything.  
Break things,  
Make some type of example of yourself.  
Fight for your freedom.  
We know you’re trapped in a loop of death but you can push through and fight.  
You have every right to be here.  
So listen,   
I’m calling out to you.

 

 

  
** Scream **

Let everything out.  
Scream like you’ve never screamed before.  
Scream lyrics like so many of your heroes do.  
Scream till your lungs give out.  
Shake and head bang.  
Have a mash pit of your own.  
Let all the feelings out.  
Let out all the anger you have built up in your soul.  
Let it out and be you.


	11. Chapter 11

** Heart **

Dear girl,  
I see you there,  
Walking alone.  
Your heart is in your hand.  
It’s bleeding with pain.  
Sweet girl,  
Don’t worry.  
He didn’t mean those words he said.  
Put your heart back inside of your chest and keep your beautiful tears in your eyes.  
Don’t give up.  
Your heart will go on.

 

 

 

** Good Bye **

My last word to you.  
I use my last breath just to say them.  
Instead of saying sweet words,  
I chose the one’s laying right on my tongue.  
I’m leaving.  
I’m gone.  
The blood has left my body.  
It’s my fault really.  
If I hadn’t gotten so upset things would be okay.  
But you’re the reason I was upset.  
My dear love.  
You’re the reason I did what I did.  
Now I’m leaving you with a good bye and a heart break.


	12. Chapter 12

** Night **

Night will set us free.  
It will lay on us.  
It will protect us as we run away to some distant dream.  
Night is a soft song playing in the distance.  
It brings us happiness along with sadness.  
It’s the reason we have feelings.  
The darkness that comes with night,  
will coat us with a warm black jacket.  
Only the moon light will show the way.

 

 

 

 

 

** Stupid **

We are made to believe we’re stupid,  
We were all made to think that we could do nothing,  
But we aren’t stupid and we can do things.  
We are not less than anyone else.  
We are different in our own way.  
But we are not stupid or dumb.  
No desion we make is stupid or dumb.  
They can be careless but not stupid.  
Keep strong and don’t believe what we were made to believe.


	13. Chapter 13

** Rain. **

Rain washes away the dirt of this world.  
It cleans everything.  
It cleans people’s souls,  
Shows them the recovery of the littlest things.

Rain washes the blood away from the scene, taking away the evidence of the night before.  
The rain hates to see people sad and hurt,  
So it keeps them indoors where they’re safe.  
It keeps them hidden from the monsters that lurk in the dark.

The rain falls down over a small girl,  
Making her dark hair wet.  
She is alone and scared, scared that she doesn't feel anymore.  
Tears run down her face but the rain hides the tears making them blend in with itself.  
The girl is thankful of this.   
She loves the rain and knows the job it does.  
She feels safe with the rain holding her, in a cold wet embrace.

 

  
** Water Fall **

Your water falls on me,  
It clothes me and comforts me.  
You are not like the rest.  
Your water is radiant.  
It lights up a dark world.  
It cleans the darkness away and washes the people that stand near it.  
It washes into them and brings them safety.  
Oh beautiful water fall keep falling,  
Keep being beautiful,  
Keep lighting up the world.


	14. Chapter 14

**Wanting**  
  
What a horrible thing.  
Wanting something that will never happen.  
Wanting old things.  
Wanting things that made your heart skip a beat.  
To be with the person you love once again.  
That kind of wanting is heart breaking.  
It will never happen and somewhere deep inside you know that.  
You cry and cry but it won't work.  
You’re just left wanting, forever.

 

 

  
** Blood **

Such a beautiful color.  
The dark red flows from cuts.  
It flows with the tears and soon becomes one with them down the drain.

Water falls from the shower head,  
Steam covers the mirror.  
The blood runs down a small girls leg.  
She focuses on the blade in her hand.  
That’s all she has left.  
She sees that no one cares and it kills her inside.  
This pain is too much for her.

She wishes for the blood to take her.  
She keeps cutting and cutting till her whole leg is covered with blood.  
Her hand shakes as she sits down the blade and washes her skin.   
Her body relaxes and she closes her beautiful eyes.  
She didn’t die,  
for that she is sad,  
but she feels better.


	15. Chapter 15

** Girl **

She once had my heart,  
This beautiful sweet girl.  
Her eyes show so much emotion, so much truth.  
Her hands are soft.  
Her voice is sweet and is music to my ears.  
Her hair is a beautiful color and I only with to run my fingers through it.  
Her lips are sweet with my name rolling off of her tongue while she laughs at a joke.  
Her eyes show so much light, so much love.  
Love for me.  
She is the perfect girl,  
The most sweetest,  
The most beautiful girl I have ever seen.  
Even if I don’t have her heart I know she still has mine.

 

 

 

 

 

  
** Why? **

Why am I here?  
Why am I alive?  
Why am I so close to ending?  
Why is life so important? Why am I so nice?  
Why am I to kind?  
Why do I love so easily?  
Why are things the way there are?


	16. Chapter 16

** Pretty **

What is this?  
A girl as pretty as a beautiful flower?  
I don’t believe it, but she's right in front of me.  
Her eyes can light up the darkest forest.  
Her smile can bright up any ones day.  
Her personality is sweet and kind.  
She is both beautiful inside and out.  
Her voice is like music to my ears.  
She is beyond pretty.

Her skin is the shade of a white rose.  
Her voice is like birds singing in the morning light.  
Her touch is as soft as a flower petal.  
Her breath is light bringing the smell of fresh flowers in the wind.   
Her sweet caring heart can warm anyones cold soul.   
She’s more than pretty,  
She’s absolutely beautiful.

 

** Giving Up… **

Why?..  
Why must we stop trying after things dont go our way?..  
Why do we try so hard and then just fall to the ground?  
Why make someone else happy by only giving up?  
That’s not right.  
Not when we’ve fought for so long.  
We have to keep pushing.   
We have to keep fighting.  
You could lose everything by giving up.  
You could lose all hope by giving up.   
We cant give up!  
We have to fight on!   
We have to keep going!


	17. Chapter 17

** This Girl **

She,  
This girl,  
continues to play games with my heart.  
She tells me things I cant hear.  
She puts fake thoughts in my head.  
She makes me thing I mean something to her but I dont.   
She makes me have hope for something that wont ever happen.   
She has started acting like a child,   
thinking I’ll move to her state.   
There’s nothing there for me.   
I will not move unless we are together but she doesn't get that.  
She thinks I’ll still go there even if there’s no jobs open for me.   
This girl keeps playing games with my heart and I cant take it any more.  
I’m done being used as a toy in this game of hers.

 

 

** Tears **

  
Tears run down my face as my body shakes.  
The sadness I feel is causing me sickness.  
The fear I feel is making me wish to die.  
Tears and blood is my only way out.  
Blood runs from my wrist.   
Tears run from my now dark eyes.  
Everything falls apart before I think I can be truly happy.  
This is not fair to me.  
I need to find my way out.  
These tears need to save me.  
I need to get the tears out.  
They feel like poison,   
Creating a monster.


	18. Chapter 18

** Alone **

One night I walk quietly down the street.  
The breeze blows past me chilling me.  
I sigh deeply as I walk.  
I had no where to go, no one to see.  
I only could walk.. Alone.   
The sounds of the night dont even come into contact to me.   
The breeze is nothing,   
Nothing at all to me.   
I think it is but it really isn’t.  
Things are different now in a way.  
I feel nothing.  
I smell nothing.  
I’m falling into nothingness as I walk.   
No one can see me.  
No one can hear me.  
I’m alone.  
I’m nothing,  
Nothing in this life.  
I’m dead and alone.

 

  
** Wind **

Wind carries my soul onto the next place.  
Where ever that may be.  
I’m taken on a wave of air as I look at the things around me.  
Beautiful colors pass by me as I’m taken.  
Reds, pinks, yellows, blues, purples, every color one can think of.   
I smile at this feeling comfortable in the never ending color.   
I could just stay here,  
in this bed or air.  
But soon the wind stops and I arrive at my last destination. 


	19. Chapter 19

** Taken **

I scream out as something is taken from me.  
Something thats a strong part of me.  
Something that means the most to me.  
My heart.  
It’s been ripped out, literally.  
A man stands over me holding my heart.  
A dark smirk over his face as he hears my screams.  
My body jumps slightly here and there.   
I cough up blood and I soon die.

If your heart is ever taken you wont be able to live with out it.  
If its taken correctly then you will live a few more seconds before death finally takes you.   
If your heart is taken then your life is taken.   
Everything is taken and gone from you.

  

 

** The Hurt Of A Young Couple **

A couple, Drake and Elizabeth, are two people deeply in love.

They care for each other and plan on getting married before their son is born.

Elizabeth’s father found out about the pregnancy and freaked out.

He beat her, mostly hitting her stomach were the sweet baby boy lays.

The father cursed and threw Elizabeth out into the streets disowning her.

Drake was driving by Elizabeth’s house and then he saw her laying on the ground, blood covering her.

He jumped out of his car and let his friend start driving Elizabeth to the hospital.

Drake held her the whole way.

Once they reached the hospital it was too late for the baby, Elizabeth’s father had done a of of damage.  
  
A few months later, Elizabeth and Drake are in the back of his car, they’re holding each other and speaking kind words to one another.

Both had been depressed about their baby but they were doing much better.

They now lived in the car, seeing as how Elizabeth got kicked out of her house and how Drakes parents had died a few years ago.

Neither had a lot of money but they had each other.

They had love and they would always hold on to that love.


	20. Chapter 20

** Keep Going **

My heart flutters and my eyes fill with tears.   
My chest fills with pain as I look up to the dark sky.   
I've lost everything so why am I still here?   
What's the point or living on?   
It doesn't matter anymore.   
Everyone I've loved has left me in one way or another.   
But something in the back of my mind tells me I need to push on.   
I have to make it through this.   
I can't give up!   
I have to keep living for those that have fallen.   
I will pick myself up from the ground of the dark hole I've put myself in.   
I will clean up my teary face.   
I will take a deep breath of the clean fresh air that doesn't smell of blood and alcohol.   
I must keep going.   
They're all begging me to give up but I can't give in!   
These voices in my head won't win this time!   
I may have lot everything but I will not lose my life!  
I will not lose hope for something brighter!   
I must keep going.   
I have to.   
No matter how bad I want to give up.   
So I blow a kiss to my loved ones up in the sky and wish them well.   
I then start walking again with burning and broken feet.


	21. Chapter 21

** White Hell **

I watch the days go in and out.   
My life feels like nothing anymore.   
My mind has taken control and my heart has broken.   
My limbs and organs don't move to what my brain says.   
I hardly breathe.   
I hardly live.   
My life is nothing but staring at these blank walls.   
They laugh at me.   
Call me names and kill me slowly.   
No one will save me from the white hell.   
That's all this is a white hell.   
Days and night start to run into each other.   
I think it's my 100th day in here but I'm not sure.   
It's been too long.   
There's no help for me.   
I'm totally alone and lost in my own thoughts.   
I yell for people to help but all I see is dark shadows taking over the walls when needles prick my skin.   
With each drop of blood my heart starts to fade more and more.   
Who am I?   
Why am I here?   
Who even knows..  
Im locked in a white hell and I've done nothing wrong.   
Someone save me please.


	22. Chapter 22

**Love**

Love will always hold people together.

My love has passed.  
She died at an early age.  
Her life was taken by someone with no love in his heart.  
I watched as the whole thing happened.  
There was nothing I could do.  
She was taken from me.  
But before she passed she told me,  
“My dear love…   
I promise I will always be in your heart.  
When your time comes I will be waiting for you and I will love you just the same.”

It’s been years since that day.   
I’m now at my very old age and my memory isn't the best.  
The love of my life is still on my mind.   
As I close my eyes I fill my body become light.  
I see a white light.   
I see her beautiful face.   
I run to her,   
We meet and share an amazing embrace and a kiss only true lovers could have.  
This is love.  
This is perfect amazing love.   
At last.

 

 

 

  
** Strength **

Strength, that is what I am looking for.  
That is what I need to find.  
If it means cutting everyone out then I will do so.   
If it means running away from this hell then I will.   
I will not give in anymore.  
I will force myself to have strength.  
I will let myself be happy.  
I will not let people hurt me any longer.   
I am going to have strength and take control of my life.   
Good bye weakness.  
It’s time for me to finally shine.


	23. Chapter 23

** The World Of Things **

 

** 10 things you know true **

the world is dangerous   
Death happens every day  
Pain is everywhere in almost everyone  
We are forced to go to school each week day  
The sky is full of chemicals   
Some water is poisoned.   
People lie  
People cheat  
People cry  
People hide

  
** 5 things you believe in **

 I believe in hope in a child’s soul   
I believe in the smile on someone’s face at a gentle action  
 I believe in the kind words of another   
I believe in the things you can touch, feel, see, and smell  
 I believe in the breath of a weak human that is struggling to hold on.

 

** 5 things you want to accomplish in life **

I want to save someone’s life again  
I want to make at least one person smile every day  
I want to write books and poems that give others hope  
I want to stop children from crying  
I want to save as many minds as I can


	24. Chapter 24

** Strength **

Strength, that is what I am looking for.  
That is what I need to find.  
If it means cutting everyone out then I will do so.   
If it means running away from this hell then I will.   
I will not give in anymore.  
I will force myself to have strength.  
I will let myself be happy.  
I will not let people hurt me any longer.   
I am going to have strength and take control of my life.   
Good bye weakness.  
It’s time for me to finally shine.


End file.
